Wise Words

Once upon a time, I went to China.  Through a series of adventures, I ended up living in the home of a family from New Zealand which also doubled as the LDS church in Shanghai.  There was a girl in the family who was a couple of years younger than me, and we got to be pretty good friends.  She talked a lot about things she had done in her past.  Often, such things included sneaking out of her house and going to parties where drinking was involved.  As we sat up late talking one night, she was admiring the life I had lived... clean, obedient, and good.  She said, "The only things I regret from the past are the things I didn't do."

I have lived a good life.  Obviously I don't mean to brag; of course I've made my share of mistakes.  In the major things, though, I've followed the prescribed pattern.  I tried to do well in school, dressed modestly, went to Church, stayed away from drugs and alcohol.  I got married to the best man I've ever known, bought a house, started having children, and generally live a very happy life.  I have always tried to do my very best in the things I have set my mind to.

At the same time, those words have always stuck with me.  Perhaps it was because they were said by a girl who had done some less-than-reputable things.  It was so interesting to me that, given her past, she only regretted the good things she had neglected to do.  It was a testament to the idea of continually moving forward, of being true to oneself, and of learning from the mistakes that will inevitably happen.  I'm not as good at this as I'd like to be, but I love the idea of delving into life with all you have to offer.

With that said, here are a few things I regret from the past:

1. I missed doing the Disney internship because I thought it was silly.  I later had friends say they had done it and loved it!  As it turns out, the Disney internship would have fit in perfectly with my major and prepared me better for the life I want to live.
2. I didn't learn how to make friends until I had lost the opportunity for many many friendships.  I still struggle with this, and had I learned earlier, I would struggle less now.
3. I only traveled to a place I didn't like as opposed to finding other places and cultures I might have enjoyed.
4. I didn't ask to be in gymnastics or dance classes when I was younger.

And here are a few of the things that I don't want to regret in the future:

1. I want to write a book.  Actually, I want to write several.  Even if I never get published, I would love to have stories to pass on to my children and others that I love.
2. I want to feel that I am fluent in a second language.
3. I want to wear hats.
4. I want to get in shape and feel strong and lithe.
5. I want to be successful at my own business.
6. I want to cuddle and be warm and motherly with my children.  I want them to know that I am somebody they can count on in any trouble, be it emotional, intellectual, physical, or otherwise.
7. I want my husband to come home every day knowing that he is loved and welcomed and wanted.
8. I want to make and cut out and bake and decorate cookies with my kids, probably over and over and over.  I'm not entirely sure how I'm going to make this desire fit with number 4.
9. I want to raise and train a foal from the very beginning of life.

"The only things I regret from the past are the things I didn't do."  Wouldn't it be wonderful to never have to say that?